Posted 1/6/2012 10:53 pm
I guess a more important question (at least for me as the topic starter) is what the fuck do you do with people like this who are in your family and want to destroy as many relationships as possible and fuckup as many other people as they can with their toxic bullshit (ie, your family, your parental relationships, their spouse, your spouse, their own children, etc).
Usually the end result of most major childhood trauma (especially sexual abuse) is the abusee turns into a compulsive liar which the medical community has acknowledged has no cure. Sociopathic behavior is usually the overall long term problem. What do you do with such a person?
Cut them off. Boundaries are useless with these types of people. I cut off my parents eight months ago. It takes a lot of courage to set that kind of boundary with volatile people, which is why you probably haven't your whole life. But things have improved for me drastically. They still act crazy, but I don't engage in any way. If they push too far, get the law involved.
Let's say said fucked up person has been creating patterns of cutting off so-and-so from so-and-so for nearly 2 decades to the point where no one is talking to anyone, which is their ultimate design. They were not isolated and shunned like they should been because they managed to hide it for 20 years.
I have to say society is correct to impose the kind of stigma it does on the abused, on balance they can't ever be trusted.
